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The Saucy Lass from Rivertown is a book fancied by Bernard at the Healers' House. It is the second object, required for the quest Mind over Matter.


Received from Messalina at the Circle of Trust Inn in exchange for a Bellegar Coin.



The whole of Rivellon has been absorbed by novels and plays so fantastic that a genuine, personal history such as this will hardly be believed. It is indeed so that the names and locations have been altered or concealed, and that a new pen has been lifted to retell the story, but that does not make the facts fictitious. This pen that I speak of, obviously, is mine and it has been taken up to make this story speak a language that is fit to be read and heard. The original author, being an offspring of debauchery, did give an account of her vicious acts in a language that does not flatter the lady that she became.

Growing up in Rivertown, and moving up the social ladder to live the life of a princess in Verdistis her memoirs did not hint at growing penitent and humble. She seems insistently inclined to employ the vulgar vocabulary of Rivertown, and more importantly and regrettably, that of the streets and her initial social climates.

The purpose of dressing up this history was to take all possible care not to give lewd ideas to its innocent readers. Those parts of her life which could not be modestly told are left out or shortened so as not to offend even the chastest reader. What is left is still a story that gives beauty to the penitent part of her life, whilst not forgetting that the best illustration of that beauty is painting it against the background of her former life - which was quite the opposite. Therefore, to give authority and strength to her regret, the wicked part should be made as wicked as the reader will bear. This is not a warning: it is a recommendation to those who know how to read this story and a signal that the taste of the wicked will not always be pleasing to those readers with a more selective palate. It is recommended that you make good use of the moral within and not of the descriptions and events of the person herein described.

(Despite the author's preface seeming to promise a laid-back read, the many chapters of this book describe in depraving detail the many encounters that this woman has had with several men, leaving absolutely nothing to the imagination. Moving up the social ladder apparently involves many sheds and haystacks, backrooms and bedrooms. The last chapter is the very picture of a fairytale, but the reader cannot shrug off the feeling that the couple did not live happily ever after, but both died young of a variety of STDs.)